I have no idea how many books I’ve read in my life but they have shaped my life a tremendous amount. Although each of them left seeds of change in my mind there were a handful that changed my thinking in some fundamental ways.

Hamlet – I grew up interpreting life pretty much at face value. People around directly expressed their mind and life was a structured set of beliefs that made sense to me. In high school my English teacher challenged us to explore the nuance of literature and explore the possibility of paradox and tension between multiple truths. The imagery of Shakespeare was a significant part of that exploration. I’m not sure I really understood this concept at the time but it started me on a journey that would come back to me at significant points in my life.

Intro to Calculus – In first year university I was exposed to a massive world of many dimensions that involved calculus and quantum physics. These concepts blew my mind at the time and I struggled to master them the way I had absorbed new math and science concepts in high school. I had an amazing Calculus professor who showed me that even difficult concepts can be simplified for the masses to understand. I’ve been on a journey to simplify complexity and chaos for people ever since. 

Bible – Without a doubt the Christian Bible is the book I’ve studied most deeply through the years. This study began with a very literal approach in my early years and as an adult I came to understand the literary aspects of scripture. It’s interesting how the context of these texts in my life have changed their meaning through the years. The sharp words of judgement that seemed clear to me in early years have recently shifted to a much stronger sense of the deep love and empathy that Jesus taught with. As the Bible’s landscape continues to unfold for me I continue to grow in my love for the Creator and their creation.

High Probability Trading – I’m not sure how to explain this one.. For most of my life I saw outcomes as success and failure. Each result mattered. It was after I started trading stocks and options that I started to think more in probability of outcomes and being at peace with outcomes that I didn’t really want. I could step back and see the big picture view that required a variety of smaller outcomes.  This bigger picture approach helped to reduce my desire to be right every single time and allowed me to view life as a variety of outcomes that involves victories and learning experiences.

Quiet – My brain is a sponge that soaks up many trends of popular thought. One of those themes was leadership excellence. My picture of success was thé extroverted leader with energy to inspire and compel followers to act. After reading this book by  Susan Cain I started to see myself more clearly as an introvert who may never be an extroverted leader. I began to embrace my introverted nature more openly. It eventually became ok for me to be exhausted after spending a day engaging with people. Recharging by myself in a quiet place became acceptable and even embraced with joy.

Emotional Alchemy – Perhaps the hardest lesson in my whole adult life has been reckoning with my emotions. Most of my life I was limited to feeling good and feeling bad. It was this book that profoundly triggered deep emotions in me that I had no idea were there. I started to let myself feel different nuance of feelings and I learned to analyze their origins which often changed my perspectives. This was an early part of my journey to much better mental health.

Atlas of the Heart – Brene Brown has impacted me with each of her books but in Atlas of the Heart she gave me a dictionary to describe my feelings with another level of accuracy. This accuracy provides important clarity for me on how to respond in a helpful way to any emotion.

As I go on this little tour of my life there are so many books that come to mind. Each of them have impacted me. So much of my life at work has been impacted by reading books. So much of my mental health recovery can be traced through a trail of books as well. There’s something about sitting down with a book that helps my brain relax and get ready to absorb new ideas